Week One

Today is the official end of week one of marathon training. I have new shoes, new socks, new hydration belt, new books on marathon training and an array of energy gels and chews I will be testing out over the next few weeks. I also managed to log 21.5 miles this week. Not too bad!

The hardest part is getting out to run. I know once I hit play on the ipod and start running, I am there. But setting an alarm to get up early to run absolutely sucks. So does getting dressed when the apartment is cold. I can't wait until I can just get up with ease! The first mile is tough too. My body gets really tight and tries to fight me on this whole running thing. Once I stop and stretch after mile 1, it usually gives in. And around mile 4 it really starts to open up. By mile 5 I feel like I can run forever!

The big run for this week was 8 miles today, and will be a good starting point for building higher milage on the weekends. I am bummed by nike+ isn't working, but I am finding that just having the music going and just running until I make it home is making me a better runner. I am not constantly checking the ipod to see how far I ran or what my pace is. I am just running, and it feels amazing.

The plan for this week is a 5 mile run on Monday, 6 miles on Wednesday and Friday, and 9 miles on Sunday fora total weekly mileage of 26 miles. I want to cross-train on Thursday... maybe some laps in the pool and some weights? An if I am feeling really good, I might bump up the Friday mileage to 8 miles.

Overall, I am off to a great start. I have my goofy belt to hold my water bottles and my gels but it is all worth it because I get a giant glass of chocolate milk when I get home. This is essential for muscle recovery! It really beats the awful energy gels, that work great but taste like someone is trying to show nasty vitamins down your throat to incite your gag reflex. Power Gels are official done, they are way too gross. Next to experiment with the Gu and Clif Shots.

Now I just have to recruit more people to join my race team... registration ends Friday!

My Mother's Daughter

“People are intimidated by independence. They will find it hard to approach you and hard to relate to you. They will assume you don’t need anyone or anything, but that is not true. It is hard, if not impossible, to find a balance.”

Thanks Mom, this explains so much. We are built from the same mold; I am my mother's daughter.

And thanks to the people in my life who recognize this, and do what they can to help me find the balance.

The thing about writing...

Word on the street is that to be a good writer, one of the things you need to do is write. Often. In my attempts to be a great writer some day, this blog will serve as my dumping ground. A series of really bad first drafts of things that maybe, just maybe, will appear in polished form, bound and published for your reading pleasure for sale on the shelf of Borders or even a cute little independent bookseller. But, probably not, as they will be much too mundane and whiny for America's palate.

Thought of the day:

Some people loose sight of their potential because they are not prepared for failure.

(Yes, I did come up with that on my own!)

I have gained an appreciation for my failures because they have helped bring the big picture into focus. Because my career in higher education did not work out, I discovered my passion for teaching. Why will I be a really good teacher? Because I have taught some really bad lessons. My practice at making mistakes has turned out to be pretty good practice for life. My favorite little saying right now "Luck is the when opportunity meets preparation." Now that I feel prepared, lets hope I am open to opportunity (read: someone please hire me for the next school year!)

As I get older, I notice that I put more value on the opinions of others. I am becoming more aware of what people are really trying to say, behind their correct words. I stop and think about why people are trying to tell me these things, and how I might have it all wrong. When I feel like I have it all figured out, that is when it seems I really don't have it figured out at all. I take a stand, and my mother tells me to calm down and wait it out. What?!? Instead of rebel, I let this marinate. Maybe I am the crazy one after all...

This week my supervisor tells me, for the hundredth time, to take it easy on myself. Don't be such a harsh critic. My master teacher nods and smiles in agreement. He believes that how I dialog with myself will transfer to how I dialog with students. When I hear this, I want to toss it out, because that is just who I am. That is what has made me successful, that is my survival skill. Believe me, I hear it a lot. Yet, I can't toss it out anymore. I am not sure how I can be successful without that critical devil siting on my shoulder whispering in my ear. But for the first time, I feel like maybe they are on to something. I need to be closer to my angel, who always sings words of encouragement. I thought I was making progress here, but it is clear I am backsliding.

Sometimes I feel as if everyone else can see the simple solutions for my life, and I can't even figure out where it is broken. I just know something doesn't feel right. It is if there is this code language that people speak to you, they are trying to help you make good decisions and find happiness. But it takes forever to figure out the code. Why can't everything be more clear? Why can't I decipher the code?

Will it always be this way? Will I ever have it all figured out? Will I ever find satisfaction if I do not? As I try to figure out where life is taking me, I stop and wonder, "who is driving this crazy bus?"